Marriage Counseling and Couples Therapy

Couples usually come to see me for counseling when their relationship has become painful or it just needs a tweak. This is common among new and long-time partnerships or marriages. The feeling that the relationship is taking all your energy and not giving much back happens to many couples at some point.

• Are there problems or issues you just can't seem to sort out at home?
• Do most of your discussions end unresolved in arguments and hurt feelings?
• Do you feel helpless, insecure, mistrusting, unacknowledged or frustrated?

You've been through so much together and yet the very things that once attracted you to each other don't seem to be enjoyed or embraced as they used to. Maybe you're wondering what ever happened to who you were and is this all there is? Additionally:

• Whatever happened to all the hugs and kisses you used to get?
• Are you not feeling intimate or having sex as much lately?
• Do you feel like you're drifting apart from each other?
• Are the in-laws or extended family interfering?
• Are there feelings of betrayal or infidelity?
• Are you having financial disagreements?
• Are your parenting styles conflicting?

The focus of my couples and relationship counseling is to guide you to:

• communicate openly and truthfully
• learn to listen differently and effectively
• stop blaming
• value each other's opinions
• learn to compromise
• support each other's goals
• identify negative patterns
• learn to make decisions together
• re-embrace the physical passion you once felt
• find and use empathy
• develop trust
• and, most importantly, get back to feeling loved and loving

In the safety of couples counseling, we can explore together the underlying dynamics that are interfering with effective communication and reducing relationship satisfaction. With increased awareness you can learn that you have choices and options that perhaps you didn't know existed. Old patterns can be interrupted and replaced by more constructive, mutually supportive ways of relating. In addition to married couples, people living together in an intimate relationship, find that counseling helps when problems cannot be solved between them.

Couples of mixed ethnicity or mixed religious backgrounds may face disapproval from their families or religious institutions and benefit from being able to openly talk, explore together and understand how to have a successful relationship.

Are you ready to go from dating to marriage? Do you want to learn how to conquer any obstacle together? Then, Pre-marital counseling can guide you into a loving, lasting, and compatible marriage. Sometimes, there can be challenges present such as:

• a second marriage for one or both
• children/step-children from prior marriages
• "his" money, "her" money, "our" money
• blended families

It has been my experience in counseling couples that when the initial relationship progresses beyond the first phase, which I refer to as the "honeymoon" phase, that is potentially when difficulties can begin to surface. A time when your partner stops looking so perfect and reality hits that you two do have differences. You may not have learned how to disagree and develop your conflict resolution skills, yet.

Talking through these and any other issues with an objective, experienced counselor, I can help you both come to a resolution so that you can move forward into your marriage with hope, love and certainty.

Finding a couples counselor is an expression of hope. When neither person in the relationship has the experience to solve their problems, it takes a wise person to recognize that seeking guidance from an experienced and caring counselor reflects a commitment to their relationship. Love for the other person can be the motivator to do whatever it takes to get the relationship onto solid ground.

My success in healing relationships comes from years of clinical and personal experience in providing a safe, non-judgmental and compassionate place for you to be heard, understood, respected and honored for wanting to regain the deep love and passionate commitment that you made to each other or plan on making, for a healthy, strong and successful life together.

It would be my privilege to work with you and be your relationship counselor. I will help you live life with your partner to your fullest potential. I welcome your call to make an appointment or answer your questions during a complimentary 20-minute phone consultation. Call me today so we can get started at:        (310) 289-4643

"It's the relationship that heals." -Irvin Yalom, M.D.